A lifetime of learning
My brother, J, died in the month of September, almost a full moon after his 42nd birthday. He wasn’t ready to go, but he also knew that that was no longer up to him. He understood that his time was approaching quickly, and it was important to him to have his family around, even if […]
Read MoreThere is no death. Only a change of worlds. Native American Proverb After many turbulent years of physical suffering and emotional distress, my dad finally bid farewell to this world on August 15th. Summer’s end brought with it the gentle calm that settles in after a long thunderstorm. These are the words I shared with […]
Read MoreThis week I became a parent. I have three children and three stepchildren, but it wasn’t actually until one of them became a typical teenager that I entered parenthood. Everything up to now was just nurturing. Nurturing is soothing their aches and sores, making them chicken soup when they are sick, buying them shampoo and […]
Read MoreDave and I had been married for only about two weeks when we found out we were going to have a baby. Well, we weren’t really going to have a baby; Dave’s oldest was going to move in with us. We may as well have been pregnant – we had only a few short months […]
Read MoreI sometimes wonder about meditation. Lots of people seem to find peace in it. My ex husband used to meditate all the time. Not that I’m all that inclined to want to do anything, really, that my ex husband used to do, besides, he used to envision himself floating up over the room and looking […]
Read MoreI was baptized when I was 26. I was looking for something, and I thought I would find it in the Church. I was in a taxi going through Harlem on the way to the airport after spending a few days with a friend, and I remember seeing an abandoned cinema. There was something in […]
Read MoreWords written for J upon his death, September 2008 The first thing J’s surfing coach ever told him was “learn to love your wipeouts”. How appropriate! Because that is the way J always lived his life. He IS a survivor in the truest of ways. When we first found out that he had cancer, we […]
Read MoreThis time it was for real. The other day had been a warning, though we hoped that the danger had gone away. When I saw the turtle floating on the water, completely motionless, refusing to respond to any of my prodding, I thought for sure he was dead. But luckily, by the time Nacho got […]
Read MoreRevisiting the past is difficult. The untainted memories of yesterday can coexist with the grown up reality of today as long as the two don’t mix. Sometimes, though, you have to go back to the past in order to continue to move through the present. The journey back through time can shed new light on […]
Read MoreIt is strange to me when Marco asks if Daddy ever lived with us. And I have to remind myself that Daddy moved out when Marco was 1. Granted, he was just a few months away from his second birthday, but he was, in fact, only 1. And he is amazed to think that I […]
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Ebb and Flow 